Monday, September 26, 2005

I. am. so. stupid.

Today. I went to school. Haha. Hahahaha. That is the greatest joke on the universe. I went there thinking I was going to get back my papers, then I come to the S C section and find nobody there. Then I went down to the class area and I find nobody there! THEN, only rich and H R appeared. The former promptly asked why I was in school so early. So early? But isn't this like assembly time? The bell has rung already! 'It's S paper today leh.'

WHAT THE F---!!!!

I almost had a meltdown right there and then. If. If I only had taken a few seconds to go check the exam timetable (which I have thrown away in some newspaper pile), I might have had the last chance to sleep in before school offically starts!! ARGHHH!!!!

Anyway, a couple of milestones have occured over the weekend:
1. My snails have been happily shagging away pretty often these days, wrapped around each other in a slimy embrace. Now, I think I've spotted . . . a baby snail!! It's shell is totally transparent you can see the entire 'worm' body within.

2. On sunday, I borrowed the whole female magazine section down. After a hiatus of many months, there are alot of magazines to read. Now, in order to make sure I don't go overdue, I have one magazine to read per day as 'homework' haha. It was so bad that we had to borrow plastic bags from the cafe in Orchard library to stuff everything in. Total weight? 12.0kg

I forgot what the other milestones are but if I remember, I shall note it down.

Friday, September 23, 2005

Hello world. It's been awhile.

There's actually alot of things that I'd like to blog about but I'm just getting too lazy. One of it has to do with a whole slew of snail mating photos. *Yes I am a voyeur (!)*

Reason for inactivity: I have a computer game. Pardon moi, am logging off to play now.

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Anyway, here's something everyone can enjoy!!

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

A rather interesting article. I'm not sure if it'd offend people but really, it's just words. I don't really know what to make of this. Don't think I'm in any position to comment either. But its really food for thought . . . at least for me.

Sunday, September 18, 2005

I HAVE GRAND THEFT AUTO SAN ANDREAS!!! AHHHH!!!!

I have never felt so happy in so long. Seriously. Life could not be sweeter . . . =) Haha, I'm not exaggerating. Never underestimate the power of games to cheer me up! Computer games . . . sigh . . . my first love =DDD

You know, they actually banned it in S'pore. And shops told my dad that it was banned. But, there was this one shop which said, 'Yes we do have it!'. Then they pulled one real, DVD version from beneath the counter haha! My gosh! Imagine my luck! It's the real thing man. Not even the fake one.

And it also cost me dad a cool $89. Worth every single cent in my humble opinion, for . . .

THERE IS NO OTHER LIKE GTA!!!!!!!!!!!

I am one happy happy happy daughter =)

Wednesday, September 14, 2005

Be With Me was gooood . . .

Yep. There were some parts that really elevate it and some parts that sadly dissapointed a little as well. First local show I've ever watched in a cinema. Ever. And the even bigger milestone is that, it's the first local show with a lesbian subplot in it. This milestone came wayyy faster than I expected. In fact, alot of milestones seem to be zooming down the horizon right now. Milestones in my journey. And when I think about it, I feel a strange sense of 'gladness' and mild amusement at how fast things move. But that's another post for another time. Let's talk about the show:

Beware all who have yet to watch the show and plan to watch it! There are spoilers ahead!

The good stuff came surprisingly in the segments I was least enthusiastic to watch. Like, the old woman part. Anything having to do with senior citizens in movie don't usually interest in me unless it's comedy. And most of the time, it's slapstick comedy that pokes fun at the oldies. Ok, I'm a young ass who thinks she's immortal. That's why I 'heck care' about oldies at the moment, cos it's feels like life is still so fresh to think about ageing. So sue me.

But it was good! The last last parts of the show was some of the most poignant. When the old man helped in the mercy killing of his wife. It was really heart warming and you knew he did it purely out of love. Nothing else. If anything, there was a social commentary about ethics here. Enthunasia from the perspective of the dying. Pro-lifers rarely know the pain of death, and hence make bearing the suffering of death seem like such a doable thing to do. I dislike how they choose to limit people's choices just becos of what their personal beliefs are. People are just different, you can't force everyone to think like you. Let them decide their fate. But anyway, at the hospice, the wife wanted release. At first it seemed like such a loving gesture, to hold her husband's hand. And then, she put it over her mouth, and pressed it tightly there. Then the husband knew, and kissed her on her forehead as she passed on. Axphyiation. I thought that was beautiful. The love and understanding shown was conveyed deeply without words. In fact, words would have ruined the mood. Cos it's our actions and not our words sometimes that reveals the most about us.

The next part was even better. The old man went to T here sa Chan's (the blind and deaf woman) house. As they were setting up dinner plates, the old man started weeping silently about his wife. Grieving. T C, couldn't see nor hear, her only means of communication with the living was through physical contact. And so, when she cupped the old man's face in her hands, she realised the tears on his face. I 100% fully expected her to ask, 'why are you crying?'. Isn't that what most people would do in a similar situation? But she did something else instead which awed me. She felt his tears, brought him close to her and hugged him in sympathy. In other words, she offered him a shoulder to cry on, even though she had no idea for his grief and met him for the first time today. Then it came upon me that, that was the exact thing that people should do, if in a similar situation. It showed a magnitude of empathy, sensitivity, and thoughtfulness, which we people rarely have. Most of the time, we ask crude and intrusive questions at all the wrong moments.

The first lesbian movie segment of a local film . . . taadaa~~ I watched this movie for this reason. And yes, the two females involved were femmes (i.e. my kind of lesbian =] ). All the more reason. There were some good parts, such as how I think E z a nn Lee (?) was cute as hell, how both girls were actually pretty good looking and had, hands down, super bods. Perfect eye candy. There was also a lesbian smooch, on the lips. Oh, that one was worth waiting for. In fact, it's the first kiss I've ever seen between asian lesbians. And it was so sweet as well! Your first kiss ... imagine that. I don't know but I find lesbian kisses very sweet. Or maybe I'm just heavily biased in this area heheh.

But.

The story had a sad ending. In fact, it was almost a total replica of Lost and Delirious, in the sense that both broke up over a (asshole-y) guy and one tried to commit suicide. That was damn sad. Especially how ez ann was denied time and time again the closure from the relationship. Someone once told me how it hurt not to have closure from a past relationship, how you couldn't move on becos of that. Now I see a little of the hurt that it can wreck on you. It was so infuriating, why the other girl just avoided the issue and never let ezan n have her answer. How utterly selfish (and cowardly) it was, to deny her the dignity of a proper closure, a proper explanation. And the last time that eza nn contacted her, the other almost replied. Almost. That last point was poignant to me cos it came so close to closure at last. So close. But alas, not.

Somehow, I'd had hoped that they would expand and build up their relationship a little bit more. I though Lost and Delirious was better in this aspect, you could see the depth of their love in their hurt and denial of each other. Plus the shakespearen references thrown in really made the film that more artsy. But I guess there was lack of screentime. The whole shebang just seems to move so fast in comparison to the slower pace of the rest of the show. They went from start of relationship to the end of it. So fast! And it was mostly end of relationship. Maybe E ric K hoo wanted to show the pain of loss of love. But then, showing the shyness from obtaining your first love could be as poignant as well. And the film could develop the characters abit more if it had gone that direction instead. By taking it slow, and showing just the two of them learning to love each other and reaching that level of relationship status from friendship status, would make for a happy ending. That's another sad thing, see. Some lesbians films don't have happy endings due to intrusion from men. It's so sad when that happens. I can say with almost 99% certainty the straight romance films all have happy endings. Boy always gets girl. Girl always gets boy. End of story. Cue in marrige scene before the credits. As predictable as me needing to go to the toilet when the tummy rumbles. But for what its worth, E zann and that kiss was goood.

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The last thing that struck me was . . . how the filmmakers managed to portray boring, HDB, heartlander, senior citizen, slow-motion action and transcend it into something arthouse . . is beyond me. Yea, they really made the ordinariness of things, the small little and nondescript things, very beautiful. The act of cooking, chopping and the love infused into food. The sweeping of the floor, typewriting, sleeping at night, eating. All the things we do everyday without realising. Yeah, if you can make all these mundane things more than what we think it's worth. That's a record.

And singapore? Art house? We? If you can portray that. My hat's off to you.

Monday, September 12, 2005

Arguably one of the worst chemistry test I've ever taken. Never felt so lost. Yep. It felt bad, but, at the same time, it doesn't feel that bad. Wonder why?

After chemistry, went IMMEDIATELY to maths consultation with ms L IN G. And it stretched to two whole hours. But now, at least I finally get complex numbers. It's not that complex to me anymore haha. (ok, seriously bad pun). I've discovered that free tuition by N J teachers really really helps. It's a real waste of money to hire tutors when you have people who know much more about the A level testing system, questions etc at your disposal. One day I must consult FA izal. Of all the subjects, physics needs the most improvement. My biggest goat about physics is how I've somehow wasted it. It's actually a very doable subject. Just that we all see it as difficult and hence 'throw it away', making it hard when it isn't. I wonder how my physics would be if I had just bothered a bit more in J1. Oh well, who cares now.

Was dead by the time my 4 hours of non-stop brain work was over. Went home and had a power nap (!). Then did the usual crap of studying all the way to America's Next Top Model. Now, although it's late, I'm like, "Screw it. I need to relax".

I think N J is really getting to me. Today as I was studying, I actually felt a slight sense of enjoyment at the realisation of a maths fact. It meant that I could possibly attain more marks in the exam, and thus my grade might be higher, and THUS, my sense of worth would be elevated. And thus, this is how I measure myself? It's sad. Really, can someone's worth to some university, some economy, be just measured in numbers and figures? Just by statistics? Using science to gauge intangibles just seem a little off to me. There are just some things in the world that you can't ever measure in units. Or even put in words.

There are some people, who are probably worth more to society and the world in general, than those who only mug their heads off and are academia-driven. I'm not saying that mugging is bad. It's just that . . . it distracts us from what really matters.

Sigh. I'm rambling, and not making any sense. (Maybe it's disillusionment from mugging) Forget it. I shall not expound on the finer things in life other than A levels. Cos right now, all this is . . . irrelevant!!!

Now where's my ODE notes?

Wednesday, September 07, 2005

Prelims. Hmm. Why do I still not seem in a state of distress?

Today I had cramps and gleefully took the opportunity to sleep in. Then, when I woke up. I checked the TV. In fact, the first thing I always do every morning since this tuesday is to check the TV guide. Why? Cos my dear people, I now have . .

Over 100 TV channels to watch!!!!

Yes. I have over 100 TV channels. It all started with me and sis having a screaming match in the common corridor over who gets to watch our desired shows. My dad was watching TV, and as we were screaming very loudly, he screamed like thunder at us. SHUT UP LAH! SHUT UP LAH! Suddenly, all screaming stopped as we paused our tirade for a split second, turned to look at him for a while, then resumed the machine gun litany of foul words from our mouths. Haha! Although I was angry, I couldn't help but feel amused at that momentary silence. But anyway, on the next day, he went out and bought more SCV digital set boxes! Just becos we quarreled over a TV show like . . . once?? Crazy. We thought he was crazy. But . . . though I was pissed he was wasting house money over TV stuff, the millions of channels soon became the main fixation.

And I can tell you, it dosen't bode well for my studies:
-I have a passion for food shows. Guess what? There is an Asian Food Channel showing food shows 24/7!
-I have a greater passion for Japanese food shows. Presto! Jet TV is japanese and they always show 2 hour long jap food shows. O M G.
-Then there is Goals TV 1 and 2, where you can skip all the boring interemediate football action and go straight to the goals. I don't like watching soccer, but I like to watch goal-scoring . . .
-ALL, and I mean ALL, the chinese movie channels are now open to me. And I've been watching a hell lot of stephen chow and his old movies lately. Have you seen Flirting Scholar? It's the one which he and Gong Li, when she was younger, acted in. Damn funny but more importantly, I didn't realised that Gong LI is actually a damn beautiful person. I watched Flirting Scholar just for her. (S Y? Watch that show! You won't regret it!). I am also trying to catch chinese films with the lesbian theme lately. But with the family trying to watch shows together with me? It's hard to be subtle about it.
-I have cartoon network! Welcome back Dextor's laboratory. And Animax, and a hell lot of other shows.

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Oh heck, at least when I study I am serious. I hope. And to further showcase my disdain for the prelims: I am going to watch Be With Me in the middle of prelims, on friday. Right after exams. This wasn't too difficult a decision to make cos firstly, it has a lesbian story in it. Secondly, it has a lesbian story in it. Thirdly, it has a . . . Ok I think you get the idea. That, and the fact that it'll be too late after the prelims to watch.

Hmm. Studies . . . Oh well. It can't be that bad lar . ..

Tuesday, September 06, 2005

I have been, of all things, interested in biology recently...

The fishtanks outside the balcony have started forming very interesting ecosystems of their own. For once, the plants are blooming and growing like crazy. A couple of potted water plants have turned into a forest, providing the dear fishes with shade and comfy leaves to rest on (yes I have actually witness fishes resting on the leaves). Here's a look at one of the more uncontrolled growths . . .






Blue + Yellow = GREEN!

But the more interesting phenomena . . . is the appearance of water snails!!! I have zero idea how water snails managed to reach fishtanks that are 6 floors above in a HDB flat. I think it either has got to do with the live worm feed I sometimes give the fishes, or maybe some snail egg spores floating in the air (think maybe the former sounds like a better explanation). But there they are! And so small and cute looking some more! Plus they move damn fast for a snail. Many of the pics I took had still and crystal clear backgrounds, but the snail was a blur. Also, I discovered that when snails want to get from one point of the tank to another without the aid of surfaces (e.g. plant stems, tank walls etc). They swim. The backstroke in fact. That means that they are upside down. And yes, they swim fast also. Enjoy!:

Hi there!

Zipping across the glass highway . . .



The (water) Shire



Can you see the baby guppies??? =)

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Took this photo by accident. The snail had crawled to somewhere where I couldn't face it physically, so I had to turn the camera towards me and click! I didn't catch the snail but hey . . . I kinda like this photo. It's interesting.

Saturday, September 03, 2005

Something from my email:

An organization of Christian fundamentalists claims the destruction brought on by Hurricane Katrina is God's judgment against New Orleans for holding festivals like the annual gay Southern Decadence party.

Repent America's Web site noted New Orleans' past three mayors issued official proclamations welcoming visitors to Southern Decadence. The Web site also noted the "New Orleans City Council made other proclamations recognizing the annual homosexual celebration."

"May this act of God cause us all to think about what we tolerate in our city limits, and bring us trembling before the throne of Almighty God," Marcavage concluded, adding a biblical citation from Matthew 5:45: "[God] sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust."

The Rev. Dr. Cindi Love, executive director of the Metropolitan Community Churches (gay-affirmative), quoted back from the Bible. "Jeremiah 29 says, 'I have good plans for you, not plans to hurt you. I will give you hope and a good future.' We rest on these promises."

"I feel sad that anyone is taking advantage of the suffering of people when they are so vulnerable," Love told the PlanetOut Network. "So, I am praying for our brothers and sisters who are blaming gays and lesbians for this disastrous hurricane. I ask them to use their energy to pray for those afflicted and to take the resources being used to attack gays and lesbians and use them to provide relief. There are far more 'straight' people, including children, suffering in this incident than gay people. I don't believe God punishes any of us with natural disasters, and I believe that God is with us in this one all the way through."

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Just one of the many infuriating emails that I receive about gay news. Most of the time, news from religious fundamentalists are extremely negative. Some of them have been downright ridiculous (I had an email, which mentioned a group about envangalical physics and how they disputed Newton's law of gravitation and said that it was God's attraction instead. And to back this up, they just quoted a biblical quote about people 'falling down to earth'. That's your evidence? Yes God created this universe but if people don't use science to explain earthly phenomena, we will not be living the life we're living today. You can't raise a bridge just by thinking about God's awesome power, you got to do something scientific. If everything that happens around us is explained just by 'God's work on earth'. What's the point of studying science?? Why need science? When religion can explain everything? By the way, I don't believe religion can explain everything cos if that's the case, then we'd know everything. And that's impossible.)

Another one was of a Southern Baptist pastor who advocated the forcing of gay kids into therapy so that they can 'receive God's love'. (If I loved Him out of my own free will, is that not more genuine than coercion?). And one of the worse was a pastor who told a boy that he was better off dead than homosexual. So guess what? That boy killed himself. I'm pretty sure he's singing with the angels now. And I hope that pastor can sleep well at night, cos there is blood on his hands.

This one I just got was the latest rubbish. Okay, I know my language is getting antagonistic and I shall imitate Mayor of New Orleans and say, 'excuse my french dear people, but I am pissed.' There are alot of things that the ignorant people blame on homosexuality. High crime rate lah, high suicide rate lah (which is one of homophobia's effects), lousy family model lah, mentally disordered lah, AIDS is God's punishment on gays lah (wow, I hate this one with a vengence), gays harm society lah . . . and the list goes on.

It seems that many a times gay people are being blamed for all that bad things that happen in society. When will these groundless accusations stop? Worse still, these fundamentalists back every assertion that they make with a biblical quote. It's vile how people use religion and God as a weapon. It makes me mad. There are so many 'external pressures' on the gay community that I want to eradicate, but sometimes, there's just too many too bear. Plus it really galls me sometimes that people can just stand by and do nothing. Nothing. The worse thing is you never hear of christians who speak up for gay people in the media. Whether they believe that homosexuality is wrong or not is a non-issue. Cos the issue here is that God's people are getting attacked by their own kind. We're all sinners in the end. But why is the perceived sin of homosexuality getting the most hate from others? AND WHY DOESN'T ANY NON-GAY CHRISTIAN SPEAK UP ABOUT IT?



It's just like how I dislike muslim moderates who don't condemn terrorism and instead choose to stay silent and not admit the glaring flaws in their community, their mosques. It's as though speaking up would seem anti-muslim and anti-community. Dude, is speaking up about the imperfection of churches and other christians an anti-christian thing to do? Maybe people do agree that there are problems, but if they act nonchalant and blissfully ignorant about it (as if it doesn't exist), that problem ain't gonna go away. And what impact do you think such newspaper articles would have on non-christians, when all they hear is the voice of fundamentalists and one that is sometimes without reason? What sort of impression does this have on people? And worse still, there is no one else trying to correct their wrong impression by speaking up. Maybe only gay christians. I feel upset sometimes by the apathy I witness. It is soo rare you know, to find a straight person who feels for gay people enough to stand up for them in the public arena. Like that straight lady I met volunterring at the PPC, during my first visit. The straight church leaders in my church.

Alot of people probably don't understand why I never ever give the gay issue a rest. Well, here's an analogy: We all know how childbirth is suppose to be painful right? But if you're not the one giving birth, you can't imagine/feel the pain as acutely as someone going through the real thing. Therefore, this issue is small in your world. But it ain't small in mine. That and also the fact that I've only recently been exposed to all these news. So I've yet to 'calm down'. And lastly and most importantly, this is my way of creating awareness about gay issues (since outrightly talking about it would probably make alot of people darn uncomfortable). Here's for education/awareness that they never teach you in schools. So yes, in a way, this is a campaign by me to show other's the gay side of things.

However, just as someone once told me, ' We gotta choose the battles we fight, cos we can't fight everyone of them'. So from now on, I'll take bad news as they come, I'm used to it already. There's a reason why people hold gay parades you know. And no, it is not an excuse to engage in a wild sex/alcohol filled orgiastic dance party. It's a cry that says, "We exist! And you can't ignore us, or treat us like second class citizens! Cos we exist and we're a force to be reckoned with." That's why gay parades are like million-mom marches. There is strength in numbers. Gay parades are about awareness. Maybe one day S'pore will have our own gay parade in town. Maybe. I think, in everyone of us, there is a cause that we all feel for passionately, that we all believe in (if you even feel anything macro and not all just micro=self-centred). Maybe for many that is about evangalism, and so they talk alot about God. But as for me, and the cause I want to champion? -it's pretty obvious isn't it? No more homophobia-



It'll start on this webpage.

Boxes of Fear

by Asha Hawkesworth


People express homophobia in lots of interesting ways. There's the screaming you're-all-going-to-hell crowd, but they do us a favor by loudly advertising their ignorance. It's the subtle homophobes who sneak up on you and catch you off guard. It's the ones who don't even think they are homophobes, and you might even believe them until the day it slyly rolls out of their mouths. When the shock wears off, you're left to wonder if it was just you, or if your friend really did just put their foot in it.

That happened to my wife and I recently. We invited an old friend of my wife's over for dinner. I'll call her Ruth. She's the mother of some close friends, and my wife has known her for years. She lives far away and only visits once or twice a year, so dinner was an opportunity for Ruth to get to know me better, and vice versa.

Ruth's children and in-laws are very open and accepting about homosexuality. I had heard from everyone, including my wife, that Ruth was also quite liberal and had "known a lot of homosexuals" through her previous business of making costumes for the theater. She even sent us a wedding present.

But when she arrived for dinner, the atmosphere was a little strained, at least from my perspective. I was wondering when I'd be involved in Ruth's conversation. She had an astonishing lack of interest in the new wife of her old friend. But if that were the only issue to arise during the course of the evening, I wouldn't be writing this article.

While I was preparing dinner for the table, my wife happened to mention that I wouldn't be able to drink any of the wine that Ruth brought, because I'm trying to get pregnant and might already be. (We're using an anonymous sperm donor and a local reproductive clinic, where they do the inseminations.) Ruth's reaction to this happy news made my wife and I angry for several days.

Ruth had previously expressed concerns about our wanting a child in an email. At the time, we put it down to her being afraid that I would have a baby and then leave my wife in the lurch. She didn't know me, after all. But this time she expressed her "concerns" in a very forceful way that was intended to leave no room for arguement: if we had a child "that way," then it would inevitably have "too many issues" (i.e., be "messed up"), so we should adopt instead.

Although angry that she brought this up again instead of wishing us luck, we tried to understand what her issue was. Wouldn't an adopted child have as many issues? It was a question of the child not knowing it's biology, she said. But, again, wouldn't an adopted child have those issues, only doubled? And what about kids of hetero couples whose dad split or died at an early age or even before birth? Or if the father was a one-night-stand and largely unknown? Were they all, because "father-less," condemned to be "messed up"as a matter of course?

I finally had to ask her why she and her recently deceased husband had three children themselves instead of adopting. She had no answer. She finally dropped it. But it was too late: we were fuming.

After a painful meal and some very light conversation, we took her back to her son's house and spent the rest of the night being angry and trying to figure out what had just happened.

So what did happen?

It was painfully obvious to us that, rather than being accepting of us as acouple, she was, in fact, very uncomfortable. We could've overlooked her discomfort. But the notion of us, as married lesbians, having children without a penis in the family was apparently more than she could bear. It may have been due partly to loyalty to her dead husband and his role in their family. But I think that it was due primarily to her inability to see beyond her boxes.

In Ruth's set of boxes, the only "right" way to be a family is to have a penis, a vagina, and a wedding vow. She's an old lady and very steeped in conservative tradition. But when you remove a penis-or, if you're a gay couple, the vagina-then you're not functioning in her box any more. And suddenly the world is uncontrollable and scary.

This is why the far right feels so threatened. It's not because of who we love. They've erased love from their equations. Love makes things even more confusing, because it's hard to have a problem with love. It's those safe, comfortable, non-threatening boxes they want. "If only everyone would stay in these little boxes, then I wouldn't have to grow," they lament, frightened.

We were outside of Ruth's comfy box. And the only way she could think of to deal with it is to tell us to adopt, although it made no sense whatsoever. What she was really trying to say is, "You're scaring me. I don't know what to think about my own life and who I am without this box. So stop doing this. Stop trying to make a family."

Ah, family.

The truth is, there has never been a single definition of a family. Oh, Leave It To Beaver may try to tell you otherwise, but that myth has never been reality. Sure, some kids have a mom and dad who never divorce. In some of those cases, they just remain committed in their misery until death do them part. No, the nuclear family doesn't have the sole magical formula for raising happy, healthy kids. Any psychologist will tell you that.

Families do change over time. Divorce happens. Sometimes Grandma or Grandpa has to help out. Sometimes one family has to live with another for awhile. Sometimes two families merge in a second marriage. Or a third. Sometimes we lose people, and a single parent has to do the best they can. Sometimes kids don't have parents at all, and they create a family with other kids. Sometimes as lonely adults, we create a family with other like-minded adults.

So, are the people from all of these different kinds of families, including the traditional nuclear family, "messed up"? Of course, to some degree or another. We're human beings. It's inevitable to have some issues, regardless of who raised us. That's part of our learning process.

Does love count for something when you're creating a family? Hell, yes.

So, how do we deal with Ruth's homophobia and insecurity? After being angry, we forgive her. This doesn't mean we'll be inviting her back for dinner. We're not gluttons for punishment. We already felt like a wolf in sheep's clothing had come into our home, and that's enough of that. But we can have compassion for her ignorance and empathy for her fear. Because her core issue isn't homophobia. Her core issue is that the boxes are disappearing.

The boxes are disappearing. That means that all of us are free to live in ways that make us happy, without boxes, without arbitrary rules. The boxes are disappearing. Personal freedom and power can be pretty darn scary. No wonder the country and the world is in chaos!

As we continue to walk a box-less path and take on our personal power, we will effect change. Heterosexuals are a part of this process, too, so don't count them out! Expect that fear will not rule the day, and it won't. Watch and see. In the meantime, you're not obligated to entertain homophobes for dinner, but you should try to have compassion for them. In the end, their struggle is harder than ours because we are already free.